Well, its one of those days. One of those days when I'm even more homesick for China than usual. I miss the smells, the sounds, the feel of the air, the commotion of the busy streets, the feeling in my heart that feels at home and feels at peace.
I don't know exactly what makes me long for these things on some days more than others. It's a funny thing when God calls you to do something. In your head you kinda think its crazy and it really doesnt make any sense at all but in your heart you KNOW its right! It feels good and perfect.
China is all I can imagine doing with my life. I can honestly say that this is what I feel I was made for. It's a passion and fire that burns so deep with in me that certain days I feel like I might explode because of it.
It might sound crazy that I know this number but it has been 375 days since I came home from China. I can say without a doubt that there hasn't been one day since then that I haven't thought about China or thought about getting back there. I dont know how many days it will be till God takes me back... it might be 42 (I'm praying for this date!) or it might be another 375. I just know that support raising has been one of the most faith stretching experiences for me. God has brought me this far I know He will complete His work. But on days like this when I feel especially homesick for China I feel like I'm stuck behind a glass wall... so close yet so far away. I have to remember that He is in control He is in the process of taking me back... it's all in His timing!
1 comment:
Awe, Alyssa I so admire your heart and desire to be where you know God has called you to! I somewhat know the feeling - I have some "crazy" things that I know God has called me to and totally put on my heart. But unfortunately the time is not now and the wait to be able to fulfill that calling and desire is hard. Some days are easier than others, but there isn't a day that I don't think about it and long for it now. I'm praying for you though girl! We haven't known each other long, but I've loved every time I've gotten to be around you! It's so cool to see what God's doing in you, and it just radiates through you that He is going to do big things through you! I feeled honored to know you, and can't wait to hear more about what He does in your life and through your life! You are gonna majorily bless some precious little lives in China when you get there, whenever that might be! I will pray that that is sooner rather than later if that's His will and that He would just continue to increase your trust and faith in Him through this hard waiting period.
Much love,
Jenna
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